We’ve all encountered someone who puts himself first—whether it’s a coworker who takes credit, a friend who never shares, or a partner who only calls when he needs something. But how do you describe this self-centered behavior in figurative language that’s vivid, relatable, and memorable? That’s where similes for selfish people come in.
A simile compares one thing to another using “like” or “as,” helping us turn ordinary descriptions into powerful images. Instead of simply saying someone is “selfish,” you might say he is as selfish as a cat guarding a mouse, instantly creating a visual that everyone understands.
In this article, we’ll explore similes for selfish people, ranging from funny and light-hearted to sharply observant. These figurative expressions will help you describe self-centered behavior more effectively in writing, conversation, or social media—and even make your readers or listeners smile, nod, or reflect.
Let’s dive into the world of words where self-centeredness meets imagination.
Similes for Selfish People (with Examples)
1. As selfish as a cat with a mouse
Meaning: Possessive and unwilling to share.
- She clung to her idea like a cat with a mouse—no room for teamwork.
- In group projects, he’s as selfish as a cat with a mouse.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a hawk guarding its prey
- As possessive as a dragon over treasure
If you’re looking for even more expressive comparisons, check out our full list of similes for bad to describe negative behavior in vivid detail.
2. Like a dog growling over a bone
Meaning: Defensive about their belongings or benefits.
- Don’t touch his stuff—he’s like a dog growling over a bone.
- She’s always protecting her time like a dog with a bone.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a toddler with a toy
- As protective as a lioness
3. As selfish as a pig in a trough
Meaning: Overindulgent and greedy.
- At the buffet, he was as selfish as a pig in a trough.
- She grabbed all the freebies—selfish as a pig in slop.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a raccoon at a trash can
- Like a greedy goose at feeding time
4. Like a squirrel hoarding nuts
Meaning: Stores everything for themselves.
- She saves her ideas like a squirrel hoarding nuts.
- He refuses to share contacts—like a squirrel before winter.
Other Ways to Say:
- As guarded as a banker
- Like a crow collecting shiny things
5. As selfish as a cat ignoring commands
Meaning: Does only what suits them.
- He never listens—selfish as a cat, ignoring commands.
- She only helps when it benefits her.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a fox in its den
- As detached as a wild horse
Similes for Selfishness in the Workplace
6. Like a boss who takes all the credit
Meaning: Seeks praise without contributing.
- He’s like a boss who takes all the credit and none of the blame.
- That’s teamwork to her—she does nothing but gets the applause.
Other Ways to Say:
- As fake as a staged award speech
- Like a spotlight hog at a talent show
7. As selfish as a mic hog at karaoke
Meaning: Dominates attention in group settings.
- At parties, he’s as selfish as a mic hog at karaoke night.
- She never gives anyone else a chance to speak.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a show-off at a reunion
- Like someone who steals all the jokes
8. Like a coworker who hides resources
Meaning: Sabotages others for personal gain.
- She’s like that coworker who never shares templates.
- He’d rather watch you struggle than lend a hand.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a hoarder in an office
- As stingy as a locked cabinet
Just as these expressions help describe self-centered behavior, you might also find it useful to explore some gentle comparisons in our collection of similes for timid—perfect for portraying shy or hesitant personalities.
9. As selfish as a kid with the last cookie
Meaning: Reluctant to share joy or benefit.
- He clutched that bonus like a kid with the last cookie.
- She celebrates alone—always.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a child with a birthday cake
- Like someone hiding snacks
10. Like a diner who won’t split dessert
Meaning: Doesn’t like sharing even the smallest things.
- He refused to split the check—selfish as a dessert hoarder.
- She hides her favorite meals from roommates.
Other Ways to Say:
- As secretive as a recipe thief
- Like someone licking the spoon and hiding it
11. As selfish as someone licking the plate clean
Meaning: Wants it all, leaves nothing for others.
- At family dinner, he was as selfish as someone licking the plate clean.
- There wasn’t a crumb left.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a buffet wallow
- As greedy as a solo diner
12. Like a British tea-lover guarding the last biscuit 🇬🇧
Meaning: Overprotective of what they value.
- She treats her planner like a Brit with the last biscuit.
- No one’s touching that without a fight.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like an Englishman and his umbrella
- As tight as a locked pantry
13. As selfish as a miser in an old folktale
Meaning: Classic symbol of greed.
- He’s like a miser counting coins by candlelight.
- She reminds me of Scrooge before the ghosts.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a gold-loving goblin
- As cold as a coin in winter
14. Like a landlord in a Dickens novel
Meaning: Obsessed with profit, cold-hearted.
- Selfish like a landlord chasing rent on Christmas.
- She cares only about numbers.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a tax collector in medieval times
- As heartless as a villain in a play
15. As selfish as an echo—only repeats, never listens
Meaning: Doesn’t truly engage or give.
- He’s an echo—selfish, only hears himself.
- No empathy, just repetition.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a mirror that reflects only one face
- As shallow as a puddle in summer
16. Like a black hole sucking in praise
Meaning: Craves admiration but gives none back.
- She’s a black hole for compliments.
- Praise goes in, nothing comes out.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a void in a room
- As draining as a broken record
17. As selfish as a selfie filter
Meaning: Only highlights the self, not reality.
- He’s like a selfie filter—makes everything about him.
- Even in group chats, it’s all “me, me, me.”
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a solo Instagram story
- As self-centered as a spotlight on one face
If you’re exploring personality traits beyond selfishness, our list of similes for attitude offers bold and expressive comparisons to capture confidence, sass, or defiance in vivid ways.
18. Like someone who hogs the Wi-Fi
Meaning: Takes up all resources for themselves.
- He streams movies all day—like someone hogging the Wi-Fi during a Zoom meeting.
- She never considers how her actions slow others down.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a bandwidth bully
- As inconsiderate as a charger thief
19. As selfish as someone stealing all the power outlets
Meaning: Focuses only on their own needs in shared spaces.
- At the airport, she took every outlet—selfish as someone stealing power.
- He plugs in all his devices and leaves no room for others.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a tech glutton
- Like someone with a 5-device setup in a café
20. Like someone muting others in a group call
Meaning: Silences others to maintain control.
- He’s like someone muting colleagues just to talk over them.
- Selfish people dominate rather than collaborate.
Other Ways to Say:
- As rude as a call crasher
- Like a podcast host with no guests
Self-centeredness in Relationships
21. As selfish as a lover who never texts back
Meaning: Only reaches out when it suits them.
- She’s sweet when she needs help—selfish as a ghosting partner otherwise.
- He disappears after getting what he wants.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a boomerang that only flies one way
- As cold as a read receipt with no reply
22. Like someone who eats all the popcorn in a shared movie night
Meaning: Ignores shared experiences for personal pleasure.
- She hogged the popcorn—like a kid with no siblings.
- He watched the movie ahead of us. Selfish much?
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a remote thief
- As greedy as a solo wallow-watcher
23. As selfish as a friend who only calls when in trouble
Meaning: Only engages when in need.
- He only shows up when he’s broke—selfish as a friend who needs favors.
- Her kindness has an expiration date.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a help hotline with no return call
- As dependable as a fair-weather friend
24. Like a classmate who hides notes
Meaning: Withholds helpful info for personal advantage.
- He’s like that student who won’t share the study guide.
- She always keeps tips to herself.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a vault full of answers
- As guarded as a test key
25. As selfish as a teacher’s pet with secrets
Meaning: Gets ahead but helps no one.
- He always sits up front but never shares insight.
- Selfish as a teacher’s pet guarding gold.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a hall monitor with an agenda
- As exclusive as a private tutor session
Funny similes for selfish people
26. Like a kid who hides all the toys
Meaning: Refuses to share.
- At daycare, he’s like a kid hoarding blocks.
- She won’t even let others look at her art supplies.
Other Ways to Say:
- As closed as a toy chest
- Like someone with a one-player mentality
27. As selfish as a child who cuts the line
Meaning: Thinks their need is more important than others’.
- He pushed ahead—like a kid cutting for candy.
- Always first in line, no matter the rules.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a jumper in a queue
- As entitled as a playground king
28. Like someone saving seats at a festival, they won’t use
Meaning: Takes more than needed, even at others’ expense.
- She saves five seats with bags—selfish as ever.
- That’s not planning—it’s just rude.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a moviegoer with fake tickets
- As inconsiderate as a seat blocker
29. As selfish as a street performer with a megaphone at midnight
Meaning: Disruptive and unaware of others.
- He brings drama wherever he goes.
- Selfish as someone playing loud music in a quiet park.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a drummer at a funeral
- As loud as a party crasher
30. Like someone who crops others out of group photos
Meaning: Wants to be the center of attention always.
- She edited us out—selfish, right?
- He posts only himself, even on our group trip.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a frame with one face
- As centered as a narcissist’s mirror
31. As selfish as someone who skips the queue and smiles
Meaning: Boldly entitled.
- He cuts lines and pretends not to see you.
- Smug and selfish—like he owns the place.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a celebrity at a small-town diner
- As entitled as a red carpet walker in a grocery store
32. Like someone talking about themselves at a funeral
Meaning: Self-absorbed, even in serious moments.
- He made the eulogy about his career—seriously?
- Selfish as someone hijacking sympathy.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a wedding crasher with a business pitch
- As unaware as a monologue at therapy
33. As selfish as a roommate who never buys toilet paper
Meaning: Uses shared things but never contributes.
- She’s selfish as a roommate, avoiding the cleaning rota.
- Always takes, never gives.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a guest who never leaves
- As reliable as a broken clock
34. Like someone who brings food but eats yours
Meaning: Uses others while keeping them safe.
- He labels his food, but eats from everyone else’s box.
- Selfish as a silent snack thief.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a coworker raiding the fridge
- As bold as a label-swapper
35. As selfish as someone who always takes the best seat
Meaning: Prioritizes personal comfort over fairness.
- Always front row, center—no matter who got there first.
- Selfish, like someone saving recliners at the cinema.
Other Ways to Say:
- Like a throne-stealer
- As sneaky as a seat sniper
Conclusion
Describing someone as “selfish” is easy—but using a simile makes it artful, memorable, and impactful. If you compare a self-centered person to “a squirrel hoarding nuts” or “a friend who eats all the popcorn at movie night,” similes give your language color and personality. They help your readers or listeners see, feel, and understand your meaning more vividly.
In writing, conversation, or creative projects, similes are powerful tools. They turn everyday observations into mini-stories. They lighten tense topics, add humor to frustration, and help you express yourself with both clarity and creativity.